Things James Harden was (probably) thinking during that Russell Westbrook brain fart

Last night the NBA world witnessed an all-time great play – in the sense that it was terrible, truly meme worthy material.

For reference, the Houston Rockets lost at home to the Oklahoma City Thunder 112-107. Just three points separated the teams towards the close, it was then that Westbrook – the greatest OKC player of all-time, remember – stole the ball intended for his wide-open (I say again, wide-open) teammate PJ Tucker, and dribbled back out to the perimeter. At that point, a smarter man would attempt to reset the situation.

Alas, Westbrook is not a smart man. Instead, he proceeded to run at a 60-degree angle to the opposite corner. He then jacked up the worst possible three-point attempt imaginable.

The rest is history and Houston’s epic free-fall down the Western Conference standings continues.

So to celebrate, here’s a non-exhaustive list of things James Harden was probably thinking during Russell Westbrook’s late game anti-heroics.

  1. Did I leave the beard trimmer plugged in?
  2. Terminator 2 is the greatest action movie of all-time.
  3. Where on earth does Brodie think he’s going? If he goes any further that way he’ll end up in Helsinki, which is ironic because he’s so hot and cold.
  4. In fact, if you look up the definition of “hot and cold” there’s a picture of him.
  5. I wonder if Melody will be at La Chatte later?
  6. Oops, I’ve been in the key for six seconds now, better move.
  7. That new Eminem album has like four good tracks. I’m serious.
  8. I’d make a great extra on that Downton Abbey show.
  9. If that’s unavailable, perhaps I can be cast in Jumanji 3. I can swap bodies with Kevin Hart and become the All-Star Weekend Celebrity Game MVP. I’ve always wanted that accolade.
  10. Man, I really have an excessive amount of split ends right now.
  11. Oh wait, Russell is shooting from there?! We’ve still got seven seconds on the shot clock…
  12. Can’t wait to watch Bad Boys tonight.
  13. Aiight, someone’ll get the rebound.
  14. You know what, watching Russ is like watching a mentally insane version of Shannon Brown.
  15. Hey, Daryl! How much would Chris Paul cost in a trade?
  16. Honestly, how good was he in the first half of this game? Had like 27 points.
  17. Working title for my book: How to grow a long beard that never gets scraggly.
  18. I love that ‘Beard Like Harden’ video

It remains to be seen just how the rest of this season will go for the Rockets, but one thing is certain. Westbrook The Great will continue to provide us with these once in a lifetime moments of joy, amusement and wonder.